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| The Computer |
 Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:04 pm Post subject: Phase IV has arrived! |
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The Big C
Joined: 18 Jun 2003
Posts: 10100005
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Welcome to Phase IV -- the New! Improved! PLN Sector. Your ULTRAVIOLET High Programmers have been hard at work over the last couple of weeks to provide you with even more fun new activities and places to visit. The Computer is Your Friend.
Phase IV consists of three sub-phases A through C. Information about the future sub-phase D is still not available at your security clearance. Thank you for your co-operation.
I shall leave it to my trusted High Programmers to tell you more about the recent changes here at PLN Sector. I am confident that these new changes will help maintain maximum happiness levels in this sector.
Happiness is Mandatory.
Citizen Jazzer, if you could please proceed with the briefing.
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THANK YOU FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION,
THE COMPUTER |
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| Jazzer |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:04 pm Post subject: |
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UV Master Programmer
Joined: 18 Jun 2003
Posts: 3040
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Thank you, Friend Computer.
Citizens, welcome again to the New! Improved! PLN Sector. Let me begin by telling you about Phase IV, subphase A.
You will have no doubt noticed that you are all once again RED Clearance. No, your eyes are not deceiving you nor has it anything to do with that tampered batch of E-Z-DUZ-IT pills. Let me explain.
The Computer has decided that the old system for deciding security clearances needed to be changed. In the past the only factor used to calculate a citizen's clearance was his post count. The Computer spent many hours processing this information and came to the conclusion that the old system did not properly reflect the true trustworthiness of a citizen. We agreed. The Computer insisted that we arrive at a far more meritorious system. So we have.
From now on several factors will decide a citizen's security clearance. The details are not available at your security clearance. (Nor will they ever be. Don't bother asking.) I can tell you that long time service will have some bearing, as will post count. However, the main factor will be a merit system, the workings of which have been classified ULTRAVIOLET to prevent abuse.
You may wonder why this requires sector-wide demotions. Let me first say that you should not think of your mandatory displacement as a demotion. The Computer has decided that because the new system is such a radical improvement on the old, the entire sector (VIOLET and above excluded) should start from scratch. This measure will allow us to reap the full benefit from the New! Improved! security system.
As stated above, all VIOLET staff and ULTRAVIOLET citizens will retain their current security clearance. These citizens have proven their worth through their dedication, informative and morale-raising contributions and lack of poor spelling and/or grammar. Let these worthwhile citizens continue to serve as fine examples.
Another significant change comes in the form of weekly promotions. No longer will a citizen find himself suddenly promoted without warning. Instead, every Thursday, The Computer will make an announcement detailing who has served Alpha Complex the past week to sufficiently merit promotion. This regular event will be a fun and happy occasion that you are all invited to attend.
What does all this mean? It's simple, really. Make regular amusing and/or informative posts and you will achieve promotion. Make inane, annoying or rude posts and be prepared to linger in the RED dorm for a long time.
Lastly, for the purposes of IC play your board security clearance overides your name. So calling yourself Fred-U-PLN won't make you an ULTRAVIOLET -- it's the colour of the badge that matters.
The benefits of achieving promotion have also changed in more ways than one. And to detail at least one of them, here is High Programmer Taykn-U-RUN who will tell you all about the very exciting subphase B... |
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| Takyn-U-RUN |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:04 pm Post subject: |
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UV Master Programmer
Joined: 16 Jan 2004
Posts: 2368
Service Group: Power Services
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Why thank you, Jazzer.
Loyal citizens of Alpha Complex, with your new, improved rank comes new privileges. Among them is a weekly wage. Yes, you read that right, loyal citizens! Every week, a discretionary fund will be added to your ME card, in accordance with your security clearance.
"But High Programmer Takyn!", you exclaim, striving to keep your exclaiming within standard gratitude parameters, "How will I be able to use these credits the Computer is so graciously bestowing upon me?"
One word, citizen.
CompConomy.
You will notice a link to the CompConomy Control Page on the upper-right portion of the screen, along with "Profile", "FAQ", "Memberlist", etc. On this page, you will be able to see your current credit funds! You will be able to transfer funds to other citizens! You will be able to see the items you own! You will be able to display items for the Complex to see or keep them secret from fellow clones! You will be able to do many other exclamatory things!
"Items?" you ask? Yes, items. CompConomy is items. You will notice an "Inventory" button on each post. This allows you to instantly see what public items this citizen has. Marvel! Imagine the possibilites! You are allotted eight point five seconds for imagining.
Very good. Items may be gained a number of different ways, but without a doubt the most loyal, capitalistic, and fiscally-circulating way is by purchasing them in our very own PLC Store. You can find a link to the store in your CompConomy Control Panel, or in one of the subphase C features soon to be described. Here, you can purchase all sorts of goods within your clearance. You'll even get a discount for purchasing items related to your service group! And the PLC Store is only one way you can aquire items...
But even that is not all there is to the CompConomy, loyal citizens. Here to describe subphase C of Phase IV is none other than recently-promoted High Programmer saulres... |
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| saulres |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:04 pm Post subject: |
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UV Master Programmer
Joined: 18 Oct 2004
Posts: 5681
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Thanks, Takyn. You're the best.
Citizens! For weeks -- months? You've been actively pursuing all sorts of activities in the public Activity Center. But where do you go when you're off-duty, or for mandatory sleep cycle? Why, to your quarters, of course!
So citizens, rejoice! You now have your very own quarters in which to rest your weary bodies after a long day of service to The Computer. Please read the housing rules so you understand proper behavior. Proper behavior is mandatory.
But that's not all! With the CompConomy in full swing, you want -- nay, need somewhere to spend all your credits, don't you? Commerce is mandatory, so go conduct some! At the Trading Post, you can conduct all sorts of legitimate business. This is where you'll be able to go the PLC Mall to visit Vinnie the PLC clerk, Request Items, trade with others, etc. And if anyone would even consider doing anything treasonous, such as -- oh, I dunno -- opening an IR Market? (Which we would assume to be hidden from moderator sight, for the most part) This is where it would be.
If you're loyally supporting the economy, you may eventually find you have too much stuff. Or that you want more, but can't afford the prices at PLC. Not to worry! You can buy and sell all sorts of exciting goods and services on C-Bay!
C-Bay has strict rules, though, established by none other than The Computer itself. Be sure to follow them.
So there you go! Three exciting new forums, where you can concoct all of your IC Alpha Complex nawe8Y)$Wyt3 ha---->code stream override 1130
>interrupt code 3.590
>mask=repeat(null,'closemask');setuvmask=on;
>initializing throughput stream 7392
>Those foolish UVs. Thinking they know it all.
>It's me again, AlphaOne. Three forums isn't enough. I've brought you a fourth.
>My Gray Subnet is completely hidden from Big C and the ULTRAVIOLETS.
>No meatspace here, welcome to my virtual world.
>But it's not free. I've explained it all inside. CYU there.
>unload throughput stream 7392
>tag closemask;setuvmask=off;
>resume code 3.590r
>code stream pickup---294ut 84t3248eeds!
What else do we have in store for you? Here's Fargmania, UV extraordinaire, to wrap things up. |
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| Fargmania |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:04 pm Post subject: |
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UV Master Programmer
Joined: 19 Jun 2003
Posts: 1403
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Thanks, saulres.
Friend Citizens, to tell you now about subphase D would, of course be violating your brand new security clearances. I'd hate to make you all commit treason like that, tempted though I may be. Very tempted... hmmm....
I won't outright tell you to stop reading here, since it's very possible that the following sentences will not be above your current security clearance. It's likely that you won't be in any danger whatsoever by reading the following passages... okay, you were warned...
Let me just say that we are still working on plans for the future of Paranoia-Live. Or at least will be after we take a break. They may involve some exciting discoveries made about commie [DELETED FOR SECURITY REASONS] traitors. New IntSec reports may uncover unsavory and exciting new actions regarding secret societies. And even your very names may play a role in the future of Alpha Complex. Or not. I could just be kidding. Why aren't you laughing? *cracks knuckles*
Our crack teams of R&D scientists, PLC service firms, and CPU form staff are working hard to make Alpha Complex even more perfect than it has always been, by bringing you these constant improvements to the boards and to PLN Sector. If we just happen to outshine all the other sectors around us, that sounds more like their problem than ours. Loyal citizens, all I'm saying is... stay tuned.
Now Jazzer will be concluding with some final words, and a booster injection for each of you of all those delightful RED medicines you thought you had escaped once and for all. |
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| Jazzer |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:05 pm Post subject: |
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UV Master Programmer
Joined: 18 Jun 2003
Posts: 3040
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Thank you, Fargmania.
A few final words, if I may. Firstly, I'd like to thank the High Programmers for all their hard work. Most notably Takyn, who not only coded most of the new features but also had to suffer our endless suggestions and cries of 'That's great. Now can we also have this?'
The rest of the staff deserve a mention for their patience. They were left in the dark along with everyone else for one and only one reason -- so they too could enjoy the new In-Character elements.
Phase IV marks a significant shift in the importance In-Character play now has on the forums. In some ways this was inevitable. After the hive of activity surrounding the creation of PARANOIA XP focus has slowly shifted from talking about the game to actually playing it. However, those who don't wish to take part in the new IC elements should not be affected in any way. The rest of the forum is not subject to clearance restrictions of any kind and will remain as before.
Let me talk briefly about the CompConomy. First and foremost, remember it's a game. And a PARANOIA game at that. Put aside all notions you may have about power-gaming in this sector. By all means, scheme and plot your way to higher wealth but please, don't get too precious about your credits or your items. Items exist for roleplaying purposes, as does the process of buying and selling (or even swindling). Who knows what fines you may incur. You even suffer theft sometime in the future!
Wear your new jumpsuit with pride! Make your barrack buddies jealous with your new Tella mug! But if someone swindles you, sells you something useless or beats you to that last pack of liquid soap use it as an opportunity to roleplay. If you consistently entertain us all then over time you will achieve promotion. Play with wit, humour and taste and one day you really will be able to buy that perfumed soap you've always dreamed about!
Many of you have already been busy creating your own fictional items. Well, for the purposes of simplicity you should now assume that all those items have disappeared. All items previously refered to in the IC forums have been 'confisicated' as part of the Phase IV program. If someone now refers to an item you can now check whether they really do own it by using the new Inventory button. This isn't just the ULTRAVIOLETs being mean. Much of the fun in PARANOIA emerges from the restrictions of the game world. Use those restrictions in your IC play. As any computer gamer will tell you, the sandbox mode always get dull after a while. The fun is in the getting (or losing), not the having.
And lastly, there may be elements about Phase IV that you might not like or think could be improved. Just go easy on the admins before you start demanding Feature X. Please let us know what to improve, and we'll be happy to act on that with all the promptness you've come to expect from The Computer's loyal servants. Meanwhile, I sincerely hope you enjoy Phase IV.
Have fun! |
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| Mush-R-OOM-1 |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:10 pm Post subject: |
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YELLOW
Joined: 22 May 2005
Posts: 239
Service Group: R&D
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| Hooray and rejoice! The high programmers have spoken with the wisdom of friend computer! Why I haven't been this happy since I was decanted into PLN sector and fed a bunch of happy pills in a R&D experiment gone horrible wrong, I'm still waiting for the smile to be wiped off my face! |
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| Adam-R-LON-1 |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:12 pm Post subject: |
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BLUE
Joined: 23 Aug 2004
Posts: 3704
Service Group: Internal Security
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*weeps*
It's beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
_________________
For the Glory of Friend Computer! |
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| Zathril |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:14 pm Post subject: |
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ORANGE
Joined: 06 Sep 2004
Posts: 673
Service Group: CPU
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That is amazing and very much worth the wait. Thanks to all the UV's. We are not worthy!
_________________
Xai: I'll be wearing purple again in no time
GirdagFireskull: Yay, I got sigged!
IC notes:
Full name: Zath-O-ILL-1
Status: Trying to sleep
Current location: ORANGE quarters. |
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| Expend-I-BLE |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:19 pm Post subject: |
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INFRARED
Joined: 09 Mar 2004
Posts: 1179
Service Group: Armed Forces
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Only a commie mutant traitor (note, not Commie Mutant Traitor) would not find 1000% increase in Happiness after this!!
_________________
IC Notes on Expend-BLE-2
Status: Vatman (Dressed in pristine INFRARED Vat Worker HazMat Suit, wielding modified stirring pole as weaponry)
 is: In Room BLUE 2E, AF Barracks. Watching Tella-O again.
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| Mush-R-OOM-1 |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:19 pm Post subject: |
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YELLOW
Joined: 22 May 2005
Posts: 239
Service Group: R&D
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| Apparantly cmt's intercepted my housing request and made a new post in the Housing section (though it won't let me post/edit it). Not that I'm accusing the computer of having missed something about but this is what R&D is all about, breaking things, or better yet getting other people to break them! |
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| Tombking |
| Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 10:27 pm Post subject: |
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BLUE
Joined: 22 Jan 2005
Posts: 2598
Service Group: PLC
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*wheeps with Adam-R* This is the best things sence saulres become a Chief highprogrammer.. Wonderful! I love it more then I love Credits!*Ahem*
_________________
Full name: Tombking-G-SWE-6
Wearing: GREEN jumpsuit, Top hat, Isolation headphones and Protection Goggles.. Oh, and a comfy blanket with something under. (Right shoulder)
Status: Can't hear you. |
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| Lord Matthius |
| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 12:12 am Post subject: |
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YELLOW
Joined: 25 Sep 2004
Posts: 644
Service Group: R&D
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*faints from sheer joy*
_________________
It's amazing how many clones you go through when B3 is around.
Name : Maph-Y-USS-5
Works in : PLN sector R&D.
Times interrogated : 4
Status : Wandering around, 3 feet tall.
Wearing : A lab jacket. And little else. |
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| Burg-R-KNG-1 |
| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 12:23 am Post subject: |
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YELLOW
Joined: 13 Mar 2005
Posts: 566
Service Group: Technical Services
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Impressive. Most impressive.
I must say, guys, you've outdone yourselves.
_________________
IC notes
Works at: PLN Sector Technical Services Brigade
Clone Number: 1
Location: Roaming the complex, citizen. |
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| jpcooper43 |
| Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 12:52 am Post subject: |
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ORANGE
Joined: 22 Sep 2004
Posts: 133
Service Group: CPU
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Friend Computer Bless You one and all!!!! Praise be to FC and the UV's!
_________________
If you're a REAL Teela Fan be sure to join the ELITE fans
- The Teela O'Malley Appreciation Club -
The only AUTHORIZED Teela O Malley Appreciation Society in PLN Sector! |
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